How do we turn a negative into a positive? Well, plain and simple. We must accept responsibility, refuse to blame others and don’t make excuses.
There are many situations over the course of the week / month / year that can get us down. Stress from work, stress from school, body image, health, home, bills and so on. When these things come up in our mind we either have a situation where we feel guilty or we worry. By feeling guilty, you are simply feeling bad about something that has already happened, but beating yourself up about it. This often puts you in a state of paralysis and ultimately continues the cycle of worry.
You need to get over this – stop worrying and start living.
The funny thing is, this event is in the past and there is nothing you can do about it. You can learn from it and ensure that it doesn’t happen again or you can dwell on it and hinder yourself from moving forward with your life. Dwelling is not constructive and results in the thing becoming ‘a thing’. On the flip side, if you are able to reflect and learn from what happened, the more you will be at peace with your actions and positivity will emerge.
It’s not just the past…
…There are things you worry about that haven’t happened yet. You spend time worrying about paying bills, deadlines at work or anything else that can possibly be worried about. If however, you believe you have control over those things, then you will be able to worry less. Likewise, if it is something over which, you cannot have control then there is also reason to worry less. All worrying does is paralyze you into inaction.
Even when you have no control over a situation, you still have a choice over how you react or respond. For me, the difference between reacting and responding is, one is more of an instinct and the other is more of a thoughtout process. One will place the blame elsewhere and the other is more self-aware, asking yourself: ‘What could I have done differently to avoid the situation or make the situation better next time it arises?’ For example, if someone cuts you off while driving, are you going to get mad and angry about it or let it pass, thereby ensuring your safety and that of other drivers by remaining calm whislt on the road.
This isn’t a lecture to say you mustn’t think negatively, just a method of processing such thoughts in a way that is both constructive and beneficial; let them go as quickly as possible and move on. Don’t hold on to those negative thoughts and let them dictate the way you behave because they will impact the rest of your day and others’. Don’t let yourself behave in a way that makes a situation worse than it already is; especially a situation that hasn’t even happened yet.
We can easily visualize bad things in our imagination and have it planned to the finest of details, but when it comes to positive thoughts, we don’t give it a second glance. Whatever happens over the course of a day should not influence your mood. You choose your mood, events do not. Not somebody cutting you off, not sleep or lack of, not the prospect of bills, none of it.
Moral of the story?
Rememeber to accept responsibility, refuse to blame others and don’t make excuses – how you behave is up to you if you want to stop worrying and start living. Now.
Connect with WathchFit Expert Michael Keane