Diets make you fat. I wish someone told me that 50 years ago.  Although I doubt very much whether I would have listened!

It is a simple straightforward fact and piece of advice and one that cold make a difference to so many. Diets make you fat.

I was 5’2, 11 years old and a shy very self-conscious girl who perhaps was a bit plump. My mother called it ‘puppy fat’. That didn’t help. I was sent to a secondary school and there followed probably some of the worst years of my life.

Children can be cruel but when their leader is a teacher. yes a teacher, who taunted me with the words “here comes the fat girl” when I walked into his class. And “careful when you sit down you’ll break the chair”. That of course led to the whole class laughing. Well you would, wouldn’t you?

I hid away and didn’t make many friends. At 15 I could stand it no longer and walked out. Getting myself a job as a copy typist in a typing pool in a West End Advertising Agency. I told them I was 16.

My father was so angry when he found out. And then he got ill. Developed a brain tumour and died.

I was so unhappy. I attempted suicide….Twice.

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I would buy boxes of chocolates and take them home, stuff the chocolate in my mouth then either hide the boxes or take them out and throw them away so my mother didn’t find out. I’d then tell her I wasn’t hungry and go without supper. But she wasn’t stupid she could see something was wrong.

There was one occasion when I was working in a department store and at the time luckily for me smock dresses were fashionable. I thought I was so fat. A lady came into the department and asked for something that was on a higher shelf. I tried to reach it and she said ‘be careful dear you don’t want to stretch you might hurt the baby’.  I just looked at her and rushed out into the toilet where I cried.

I didn’t tell my mother as I knew she’d have said something about it.

Soon after that I left home and carried on my love/hate relationship with food and diets. Tried them all over the years.

I had this awful view of who I was. An unlovable, fat worthless nothing.

My self-esteem could not have been lower. I was alone, living in various bedsits, a few friends from time to time, a few relationships too. But nothing lasted and I drifted from job to job, And it went on for many years. But I met a lovely man and got married and for a while it changed. But as things went wrong in the marriage (he had a business which had a lot of bad debts as a result of people not paying -we were owed thousands and thousands of pounds) and eventually the business collapsed, the bank took my home and the marriage dissolved.

And it was at that point, strange as it might seem that things started to change for me.

I came across a book, ‘You Can Heal your Life’ by Louise Hay and it spoke to me. I felt like it had been written specifically for me. And I started reading and learning about accepting myself and letting go and somehow forgiving all those – including that teacher!

And I learned that unless you love yourself nothing in your life will work.

I learned that once you love yourself everything in your life does start to work out. Weight drops off because loving yourself means you don’t feed yourself rubbish. You look after yourself.

At age 42 or thereabouts I was in the best physical shape of my entire life up until then. But I’ll let you into a little secret – sometimes the weight comes back on again and then it goes…

The miracle is that now I just let myself be. Because we are after all human be-ings, not human do-ings running around after others all the time with no thought for yourself.

I teach ‘be-ing’ – learning to listen to your heart, listening to what you really want, who you really are.

That truly is the only way to lose weight permanently.

The word ‘diet’ actually means the kinds of food that a person, animal or community habitually eats.  But it has come to mean so much more.

I have written copious amounts and lots of words on the subject. People going on fad diets, restricting one thing or another, only eating one certain food or another. IT DOESN‘T WORK because long term your body will suffer!

The body is an amazing ‘machine’ with wheels and cogs that do certain things. And in order to function at their best they need to be ‘fed’ with the correct vitamins and minerals.

If you restrict a particular food group then the function that group enhances will lessen. It’s a fact.

And when you come off that restrictive diet 9 times out of 10 all that weight will go back on plus a whole load more because your body is now gearing up the fact for the next time it’s being denied.  That too is a fact.

Trust me I’ve done so much research on this subject. 

The only way to permanently lose weight is to change your thinking.

41625608 - negative thinking will never make your life positive - inspirational handwriting on a napkin with a cup of coffee

How many times people start a diet and feel denied or being punished. Well if you feel like that no wonder you’re still fat.

Even weight loss is down to the law of attraction; what you think about you become

I’ve seen the evidence not just for myself but all those people I’ve helped and I’ve seen helped over the years.

Changing your thoughts changes your actions and that leads to all sorts of good stuff happening. 

And it’s not just a ‘positive mindset’ in fact nobody can be positive 100% of the time, that’s a bloody nonsense!

It is being who you are. Being true to yourself that brings in the changes

I also teach practical stuff to my clients. Things I learned the hard way. What foods shouldn’t be eaten first thing in the morning which will set you up for eating more and more as the day progresses and rather than losing weight you’ll gain. Yes totally true!

It’s not just your mindset that I help with but that’s the start. I give practical tools that you can use for all areas of your life, every day of your life.

At age 42 I was probably too thin. A fact that believe me it’s very weird to even think let alone talk about!

I’m not very tall. Now in fact I’m just over 5ft. but hey they say good stuff comes in little packages! And my weight has stabilised over the past 15 years at just under 8 stone (50kg). Perfect for me!

Sometimes it’s a bit more and sometimes a bit less but the lovely thing is I’m not obsessed with it the way I was in my late teens, 20’s and 30’s.

I did so much harm to my body because I didn’t understand and I’m glad that life has moved on where people have so much more information than when I was growing up.

Bullying at school is the worst thing imaginable for a sensitive child. You can carry it around with you for years and it can blight your life. I know.

I hope that you’re not going through anything like I did but as you can see I’m well out of it now and through finding my own mentors I stopped being the victim and learned to live.

I found out that food can be good. I stopped viewing it as the enemy

And now all I want to do is help people who maybe going through the traumas of dieting, or even just wanting to lose weight.

Diets make you fat. I can’t say it enough times!

The words of Simon & Garfunkel’s Bridge over Troubled Water come to mind; “If you need a friend I’m sailing right behind, like a bridge over troubled water I will ease your mind”.

What I teach comes from experience not books. Let me share my knowledge with you so you don’t have to go through what I did.

Connect here with WatchFit expert Adrienne Marks 

 

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