Here’s a pattern I have noticed in my female clients who I’ve coached over the years. The ones, whether single or in a relationship, having regular orgasms, are the ones who are able to handle stress in life better!
So let me frame this up for you. I’m not talking about this from a sexual perspective. I’m talking about this from an internal safety and security perspective.
Let me give you an example
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One of my clients was in a relationship with a partner who wasn’t that interested in sex at the time. She was feeling frustrated and stressed, thinking there was something wrong and everything in her life at the time was getting to her.
So, I asked her if she was masturbating, which she replied ‘No’ to.
So my advice to her, was that she started to do this.
When I checked back in with her on our next session, I asked her, did she masturbate and was she feeling better. Her response was ‘Yes’ and that she was feeling a lot better. And what became interesting for her was that all of a sudden her partner was now interested in sex with her!
So, why does this happen?
When we relax and surrender to the internal connection we get whether through masturbation or through sex, it creates physiological changes within the body that stimulate our Parasympathetic Nervous System.
Our nervous system, which is the first system in the body to develop in the womb has two branches. The Sympathetic Nervous System, which is our fight or flight side, and our Parasympathetic Nervous System, which is the rest and digest side.
One of the main nerves of the Parasympathetic side is the Vagus nerve.
One of its key functions in the body, is helping with breathing. It also has a huge effect on our entire digestive system, which has its own nervous system. Only recently is has been found that the Vagus nerve runs all the way down into the genitals.
Having an orgasm is not all about sexual pleasure
Nor is it something that is just about stimulating the genitals. Scientific literature confirms that we masturbate and have orgasms while in our mother’s womb and as baby’s!
Further studies done with spinal cord patients have shown that you can elicit an orgasm, by stroking the shoulder or neck!
80-90% of the nerve fibres of the Vagus nerve are what are known as sensory. Meaning their primary role is to take in the information being sent from our environment, which includes our thoughts and they pass that information back up to the brain.
The brain then responds to the messages received and act on it by releasing the relevant hormones that can either switch key functions of the body on or off.
When we’re not having regular orgasms, we’re putting signals out that attract the opposite sex or stressful situations into our lives because internally we do not feel safe and secure. Remember one of the main reasons we are here is to procreate!
Though, when we are having regular orgasms, we are letting ourselves know internally that we are safe, we don’t need saving.
So whether you are single or in a relationship and not having regular sex, make sure you are creating your own internal safety and security, as we also release large amounts of the key hormone Oxytocin. Which is known as the love hormone.
When Oxytocin is released, it inhibits the release of our stress hormone, Cortisol.
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